I've been on a sort of bender for the last month or so. I've been eating and drinking everything that comes my way, then feeling guilty about it, then feeling too tired or emotional to exercise. Food is, quite honestly, the only thing that distracts me from my bizarre emotions. I've accepted that until I'm medicated, it might be the only thing that helps me get by. But then I've also accepted that this is not a healthy way to live my life.
That's where the guilt comes in. Why does depression have to be so cyclical? The more I eat the more I feel like I need to eat. What a sad existence. I made "take it slow" my motto yesterday and almost had a semi-normal day. I made the mistake of going thrifting which over-exerted me, and my anxiousness drove me to food. I'll get this figured out, someday.
photo by ashlicrowe on instagram
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